IN YEARS GONE BY

You don't have to stick to the old-fashioned etiquette, but knowing who traditionally would pay for what may give you some idea of how to divvy up your budget.

The Bride's family paid for:

* All the stationary, from the save-the-dates to the guest book and, eventually, the thank you notes.

* The bride's dress, veil and lingerie, plus her honeymoon wardrobe.

* Flower arrangements for the ceremony and reception, and bouquets for the bridesmaids and flower girls.

* Gifts for the bridesmaids and flower girls.

* The groom's band.

* Transportation for the wedding party on the day.

* The photographer and videographer.

* The reception, including the venue hire, decor, most drinks, food, music and tips for servers.

The Groom's family paid for:

* The engagement ring and bride's wedding band.

* The marriage license.

* The officiant's fee.

* The groom's suit.

* The bride's bouquet, boutonnières for the groom and his groomsmen, and corsages for the mothers and grandmothers.

* Gifts for the groomsmen and ring bearer.

* The rehearsal dinner.

* Liquor for the reception.

* The honeymoon.

The bridesmaids paid for:

* The bridal shower and the bachelorette party

* Dresses and shoes

* Travel expenses and hotel.

The groomsmen paid for:

* The bachelor party

* Suits and shoes.

* Travel expenses and hotel.